On Dating A Widow
Articles - Lifestyle
I'd like to share with you an experience I had awhile back. I was dating a very beautiful, although reserved young woman. We were enjoying a nice relationship, but something seemed a bit wrong. She was a bit preoccupied it seemed and I couldn't put my finger on it. I eventually found out the truth - she had lost her husband recently.
by JosephMatthews


I'd like to share with you an experience I had awhile back. I was dating a very beautiful, although reserved young woman. We were enjoying a nice relationship, but something seemed a bit wrong. She was a bit preoccupied it seemed and I couldn't put my finger on it. I eventually found out the truth - she had lost her husband recently.

Many times, men like to show their bravado off and are ready to play a strong game with women, determined to get the upper hand in relationships. I'll admit, I can be that way. I realized this wasn't the time nor the place to act in that manner.

Needless to say, the whole experience was humbling, and I learned a few things that I'll share with you.

As I mentioned above, it's not a time to play the cut throat. You have to know that you aren't just here for a wild fling. You'll have to be very understanding of the situation. She isn't trying to put a guy through the grinder, like many women do. She's trying to feel normal, and to move on with her life. You are dealing with an emotionally wounded person, so act appropriately.

If you find yourself in this situation, you must make an active choice whether to stick with it or not. It's not an easy situation, so consider that before moving forward. If there are children in the mix, it can be tougher, exponentially even. You aren't a bad person if you decide not to stay, for whatever reason.

If you stay with her, you'll have to live with a few things. You won't be able to replace the husband. Don't even try. He was taken from her, and given that, the grieving process can be difficult and uneven. You have to allow her grief to run it's course, no matter when it happens.

This can be tough, as any little thing can remind her of the deceased. That is why you need to make a decision and stay with it. A perfectly great night can be ruined in a moment, and there is little to be done about it.

Something else to remember is this: allow her to escape this issue, even if for a short time. Be an outlet for some fun. She'll move on quicker, and the night will seem like any other date. Just push for fun, some excitement, but be mindful. Any don't bring HIM up. That's the last thing either of you wants. If she wants to talk about it, let her, and move on from the topic when you are ready.

Given the above, I don't think I have to mention that you shouldn't push for any intimacy. Again, that should be in her control. Letting her know that she is wanted is a good thing, but there is a good chance she won't be ready to move on.

It will take time, but these things will change. Be understanding of her situation, but other wise, treat her like any other human being. You could end up having a wonderful relationship with her. But you will have to allow things to run their course. It will be a better situation for all parties involved.

DISCLAIMER: This article is provided as information only and is not to be taken as financial advice.